In the summer of 2016, I was battling an intense season of depression and PTSD. Every few days, I would take a Sharpie and scrawl the word “Joy” on my wrist. I wasn’t feeling it very much, but looking down at the word on my flesh reminded me that those moments did still exist, and were worth living for.
It’s strange, we see Joy as such a big word – a big word that must reflect big things. But that couldn’t be further from the truth. Because when I think of the times in my life when I’ve felt the most Joy it was when the big things were falling apart. When I had to really hone in on those small moments that made me feel alive.
You know the moments I’m talking about –
when the past and the future converge into now.
And your heart beats and skin tingles and the clock pauses.
“A perfect moment?”
“When time seemed to stop, and you could almost live in that moment.” *
And those moments can find you anywhere, if you’re ready for them. They’re the moments you file away in that corner of your brain to take out when darkness hits. To replay, to relive. To have life, and have it to the full.
Are those moments fleeting? Yes. Of course. But isn’t life itself?
We are mist.
Nothing. Here, then gone.
But why let this sentiment lead to abandonment of Joy?
The temporary nature of things shouldn’t paralyze.
It should invigorate.
Be your call to action.
Go, live as well as you can for as long as you can, and let the vapor fade when it will.
Your best is all the Universe is asking of you.
*Star Trek, Insurrection (Film)